October 10th, 2007

Tags: francine, girls Subject: Francine & I are no longer dating Time: 10:11 am Current Mood: relaxed

So, why? Because we just don't have the chemistry we both want. We're still friends, and we're both doing pretty well. It was definitely the best breakup either of us have ever had. We talked on the phone (and then on Skype when her cell phone died). Laughing, and crying together over the phone. The best part was when we were acknowledging each other different for things. Within the context of Landmark Education, "acknowledging" someone actually means more than normal. So it was really touching and fun to get to acknowledge her, and to be acknowledged. And the training that both of us have gotten at Landmark helped make that easy/gentle breakup possible. Every time one of us would get on it, we could realize that we were feeling like "I'm a jerk for breaking up with her", and that wasn't actually true. And so we could let it go, and not be controlled by that feeling any longer. So, the relationship was [april 22 - october 9] = about 25 weeks, nearly 6 months. Oh, and I'll be hanging out with her when I come down for Thanksgiving, so have no fear about inviting both of us to events.

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April 22nd, 2007

Tags: francine, girls, goodnews Subject: I asked out Francine :) Time: 11:59 pm Current Mood: happy

As you may have noticed, I've been spending a lot of time with a beautiful woman named Francine. I asked her out, and she said yes. :) To answer the question I've been getting a bunch of times already: yes, I had been planning to stay single until I went to grad school. But, I realized that I was using that as an excuse to not commit. I've actually had similar issues come up with other things, where I decide to not do something now, so that I have the chance of doing something else later. I've decided to stop doing that; "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" as the saying goes. And, the other thing I realized is that I'm actually willing to consider a Long Distance Relationship with Francine. That's something I've almost never been willing to consider, until now. So, yes. This is your official notice. :) ( Another photo of her )

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March 12th, 2007

Tags: girls, serene Current Music: [some trance on a web radio station] Current Location: Work Subject: Serene & I broke up Time: 01:31 pm Current Mood: sad

I was trying to find a geeky, nerdy way of putting that subject, but I couldn't come up with anything good. So, I'll just be blunt. Serene & I have felt a lot of distance between us, but we weren't really sure what was causing it. We've talked about it a few times, but we were never sure what it was from. We broke up for two reasons: She wanted to date someone that wanted to be with her [for the foreseeable future]. At the beginning of our relationship I told her that I wanted to be single when I went to grad school. She understands why, and thinks it'd be unfair to get in the way of that preference. It just doesn't fit with what she wants. She wants (and deserves) someone she's in love with, and who's in love with her. I want, and deserve, the same. She was [I think] in love with me. I wasn't in love with her. She came over Saturday night and burst into tears. Once she'd calmed down enough to be able to explain, we talked about it for the rest of the night. We tried to come up with some alternative, but (since I was committed to being single for grad school, and even more importantly, wasn't in love with her) we couldn't really come up with any. There's no rancor (unlike with most of my ex girlfriends); it was a mutual and amiable breakup. In fact, we both care about each other a lot, regardless of our breakup. We'll stay friends, and we'll continue to talk, just like I have with some of my other ex's. It was the right thing to do. It still hurts. Update: I forgot to say this before, but I realized that the "distance" that Serene & I've been feeling was ... that commitment to be single when I go to grad school. Perhaps to you, not a shock; but to me, it was. It was pointed out to me, and I went "... oh wow." Because with that commitment there, our relationship had nowhere to go.

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October 30th, 2006

Tags: girls, goodnews, happy, memories, notetoself, serene Subject: It's official! Time: 02:07 am

Last night, Serene (photo #1 #2) said yes, she'd like to be my girlfriend. :-)

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